Bedding and Clothing That Should Be Burned

Remember the story THE VELVETEEN RABBIT, and how the bedding and stuffed animals of the boy had to be burned?  Didn't he have scarlet fever?  Anyway, yesterday, this woman returned a bag (garbage bag) of bedding that I think should have been burned.  She claimed to have just gotten out of the hospital with pnemonia.  I don't know, I never thought of pnemonia as contagious, more something someone gets when an illness goes to ones lungs.  Okay, but anyway, I don't know if her coughing was supposed to make me more  sympathetic or if it was supposed to distract me from what looked like the result of her emesis all over the bedding.  She wanted to keep her own garbage bag, so I had to get another one.  Later, after the return was complete, when the woman was in another part of the store,I must have had an expression of disgust on my face, because another customer was sympathetic to what I was doing.  She commented what we must  have to do at Customer Service sometimes are intolerable things.

Also yesterday, a man brought a pair of jeans from our store that only had a upc on the inner cloth tag.  While the cloth tag did match the one on his receipt, I don't for a second believe he wore that pair of jeans only once.  He claimed the zipper broke the first time he wore the jeans, but when he went to get another pair, I put gloves on to touch them.  The jeans were so soiled with cigarrette dust that they reaked of it and they looked as though they'd been dragged through the dirt and used to wipe out giant ashtrays.   Somebody later said some people probably don't do laundry, they just return clothes to the store where they bought them. I put the gloves back on when the customer came back to the return counter with a brand new pair of jeans..  I thought it was interesting how the man kept telling me about the embarrassment of his zipper breaking.  Did he want me to give him his money back on those old jeans and have the store reimburse him for what happened to him?

What's Your Problem?

Sometimes, it takes everything in me not to yell at the top of my lung capacity, "WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?"  There was a guy yesterday who came up all grumpy wanting to exchange something.  He didn't want a refund, he just wanted to go get something else.  The second time he approached me, there was still nothing that could crack his surly demeanor.  He was crabbed! Okay, so I started to do the exchange, then he threw a fit and accused me of ripping holes in his precious plastic bag.  As he straightened his plastic bag, which I noticed had no holes, only a few wrinkles, I saw he didn't share my feelings on plastic bags.  When I see plastic bags, I think how they kill animals, fill our oceans and trees and  in my mind are one of the worst thing ever invented.  I diverge. Next, the man put the new item in the bag, the more expensive item which I hadn't scanned yet!  I  said nothing to him, as I gingerly pulled back the bag in order to expose the barcode, hoping I didn' set off his simmering temper which was apparent in his body language.  I'm the first to admit I have my own issues, but sometimes at work it's hard to realize that somebody else's issues are all his, and that if he pushes my buttons until I yell at him, which I've never done at work, then he's won the match of the psyches.  I know I'm way smater than this guy, and I am not going to let him win, because he is annoying as hell.

Let's Break all the Rules and Do What's Wrong

Two male senior citizens give tough competition  to a thirty-something female all vying to be the most unreasonable people demanding things at the customer service counter.  Trailing in last place is the soft- spoken  man  without a receipt bringing back the 7 piece pan set he, "bought last Thursday".  The employee thought in her head, No way in Hell.   Well, there are a few problems, some of which the employee can't mention to the customer.  Like she can't inquire, "What did you do take a metal chisel to the non-stick coating?"  However, she can ask  if he used metal in the pans, or what heat setting he used.  He'd never heard of the flu symptoms that can caused by overheated non-stick pan coating.  Anyway, then she realizes he can't even count to seven.  She does tell him he's missing a pan and missing a lid.  At first he tries to argue with her, but she just points to the picture that is on the box that he's supposedly had to look at for almost a week.


The other man starts out pleasant enough, but then starts stamping his foot and yelling like a toddler when he doesn't get back the exact amount he paid for a camera that  he claims doesn't work consistently.  When the employee explains that he bought it in a state with a 2% higher sales tax than the one where he's returning it, she also tells him he needs to go back to where he bought it if he wants the sales tax difference.  Instead of understanding that this is not the repsponsibility of the store, he yells louder and stomps his foot  more dramatically.  When the manager comes over, she tells him she would want her five dollars too.  Yeah, we all understand why the widdle boy is upset!  He wants his five dollars, and he wants it now!  But techinally, it's $4.94, so the manager says, "Can you count out 6 cents so that  then the mean store lady can give you your five dollar bill?"

Our third contender is a woman who actually has a bonafied toddler in the shopping cart with her.  The only time she says anything to him, it is to yell at him when all he did was ask when they were going to leave.  It's apparent this woman knows how to do little more than yell when she approaches the customer service counter immediately yelling and demanding that store policy be broken for her, because she's somehow entitled.  She has a stack of clothes she's returning, but she can't find her receipt.  But, store credit won't work for her, because she needs money put back on her credit card.  So,when  she is told that the store employee won't break store policy, she yells louder that she needs to talk to a manager.  The same manager who refunded the state sales tax difference is the one who answers the page.  In this case, the manger tells the customer that the customer service representative is following  correct store policy.   The woman responds by ranting and raving about how store policy was broken for her previously when she couldn't find her receipt. In a calm tone, the manager explains that she doesn't know who broke store policy, but says it shouldn't have been done.  Then, she says, "Okay, we will do this for you one more time, but no more."  So, for a second time, this manager is giving in to a tantrum, and no lesson will be learned except that if you yell loud enough, you get what you want.  Just to rub her victory in the face of the customer service employee, the woman finally  her inside voice and says, "I want you to know that I really am a nice person, and that this was nothing personal against you."

Inventory

Any time a box with multiple things is returned to a store, an inventory of the current contents must be done.  This is the case even if the product is defective, because the manufacturer often won't give credit for something that has missing parts.  For example, a man was returning an ear piece device to a cell phone accessory store, because the quality of the sound wasn't up to his standards.  What did he expect for twenty bucks?  Anyway, the employee handling the return couldn't find the usb cord at first, because it was still attached to the adapter.   She realized the ear-wrap wire  was still attached to the speaker that goes inside the wearer's ear.  The customer removed the usb cord and the wire, explaining, "So it will look unused."  The saleswoman responded with a tone of amazment, "Oh, well this won't be resold, so you don't need to bother."  She was also thinking that would be gross if we lived in a world where someone would stick something in his ear, and then when that item was resold it was stuck in the ear of a perfect stranger.

So, What's the Problem?

Somebody tried to return a box of golfballs to a sporting goods store.  He claimed he opened the box to discover there were different brands of balls in the inner boxes. This, of course was the store's fault, because it had supposedly sold the mixed-up box, since the outer box rang up $15 and was from said store.  The man said HE purchased the box just as it appeared right then.  He said it had no shrinkwrap on it.  There was no comment from the woman with him.  When management was called, the guy started talking louder and more animated, as though this would make him more convincing.  He claimed that the sporting good  store would have to pay for it's big problem. 

Another way the guy tried to prove his case was to say that one of the inner boxes alone was worth $50.  So, the employee of the sporting goods store who was standing there wanted to ask him, why wouldn't he keep the $50 box that came from a $15 one?  Wasn't that a real bargain?  What was the problem with that?  Anyway, when the inner boxes were scanned, they were not from the sporting goods store where they were being returned.  That's when the guy's story changed.  He turned to the female standing next to him and asked if she got them somewhere else.  Hadn't he already said HE bought them?  When the return couldn't be completed, the man angrily told the employees to throw away all of the golf balls.  Why?  Why wouldn't an honest and sane person just take them and leave?

Yelling Louder

Have you ever noticed, when two people are fighting, sometimes one or both persons will get louder for no good reason? I've gotten louder in a heated conversation without even realizing it. The other day, there was this guy who was also a customer, and he had a complaint about our store. Our big, big, worldwide store. A store so big I used to boycott it long ago, because of its hiring practices. I figured that had to change when I was hired by this store in a heartbeat, when other places rejected me for no good reason, other than someone didn't like the way I had my hair cut or the way I wore my clothing. Now, I am a happy employee of this store that is not about to go belly-up anytime soon, and a good deal of my income goes to this store. So do other people's incomes go to this store. Anyway, this complaining, whining customer demanded to see upper management. So, he did.

I liked how the customer was yelling at the top of his lungs, as though this would make his point more valid, or would prove his point. The manager calmly asked the man what was his proof of the specific offense he claimed that had happened to his product? What the guy was saying was that the item was defective in some way, not working, plus it was missing a thingamuhjigger, and that it was returned to our store and then returned to the shelves before he purchased it. The manager said, "Well, sometimes those don't have a [thingamuhjigger], so how do you know it was supposed to have one?" The guy wasn't being heard, even though he was yelling. The manager wasn't being understanding and kissing up to him. He wasn't giving him whatever the customer wanted beyond what was reasonable. So, the raving customer was saying how he was going to sue our store, and we'd all be sorry. At no point did the manager's own temper seem to rise. He just responded, "Okay, you do that." I almost clapped my hands and said, "Bravo," but then I remembered I was watching real life.

Later that same day, or maybe it was the next, there was a woman trying to return something without a receipt. She was told we don't refund that item without a receipt. She complained. A manager was called over, and told her the same exact policy. The woman asked where it was written that this was our store's policy. I wanted to put in my two cents and say, "Maybe it's on the back of your receipt," but I didn't. Sometimes it's really tempting to be a smart alec with the customers who can be whatever way they choose. I have had people ask me such questions, and I point to our very clear policies written on the wall. The woman wanted to speak to higher management. Luckily, passing by there was the manager from the other incident helping a customer out with a very large object. Unfortunately, it was time for my lunch, and I didn't get to stick around to find out what happened. I meant to ask someone upon my return, but we were so busy I never got a chance. Now that's real life!

Rumors, Plastic, and Cancer

Okay, I'm not sure how this exactly relates to customer service, except it is important for consumers. I was trying to look up what I'd heard about plastic bottles, particularly used ones that had sat unrefridgerated for eight hours or more. I'd heard these bottles were found to leech chemicals and cause breast cancer. The American Cancer Society page says this story started as an email, and it is just a rumor. Apparently, the person who wrote the original email was writing a college thesis. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) states that the DEHA in plastic bottles is not a carcinogen, or cancer causing agent for humans.
Personally, I still think glass is more natural than plastic. I try to recycle plastic bottles whenever I use them or somebody has used them. Well, actually, I recycle glass too. Glass comes from sand, and it comes from the earth. It's natural. Plastic comes from chemicals, and nobody is going to con me anymore into putting tap water in a plastic bottle and selling it to me as something else. Having said this, I guess I can't tell you that the chemicals in plastic likely cause cancer. However, I can say, I think plastic is unnatural.

Interruptions

This morning, I was trying to enjoy my son's birthday when the telephone rang. I thought someone was calling to wish him a Happy Birthday. But it was one of my credit card companies. Maybe I lost one of my cards and didn't notice (not likely). Anyway, it was a marketing company hired by my credit card company to try to sell me insurance. What kind of insurance? "Accident Insurance". I asked was that like life insurance, the customer service woman said it was more like if I fell through my porch and couldn't work.

The woman tried to verify my age so she'd be sure I was eligible. However, she was off by 4 years. I joked that I didn't appreciate how she made me older. Anyway, after I'd already said I wasn't interested, she kept talking. I told her I was scared of anything where the premium amounts weren't mentioned. That's when she said, "Well, I was going to tell you the cost, but that is when you interrupted me the first time." That's when I hung up the phone. Hanging up on someone isn't as satisfying as it used to be. I used to be able to slam down a receiver. Now I press a button on a portable receiver and place it on a charging station. I didn't say anything before I hung up, but I was thinking, isn't SHE the one who interrupted me? Didn't she call me on my son's birthday morning before I have to leave for work and interrupt my time with him to sell me something I don't want?

Okay, that woman is just doing her job, and I'm not saying I could do it any better, but I don't think I would even accept such a position where I'm selling people things they really don't need. If somehow that telemarketing job was the only one I could get, then I wouldn't keep talking when someone politely said she wasn't interested. So, maybe I wouldn't even be offered a sales job like that, since I'm not willing to be an annoying impolite person interrupting people and then accusing them of interrupting me. Even if I did interrupt her, I have ADD, and my brain works differently. I don't interrupt intentionally. When that phone rang, I didn't think, okay, I have to concentrate on not interrupting the annoying sales person. What really bothers me is not that the woman was trying to sell me something or that she's a telemarketer, but that she scolded me for interrupting her. She's not my relative or my partner or my friend, and I don't owe her any of my time. In fact, I'd given her more of my morning than I wanted to give.

Attitude

Sometimes, in the case of customer service, and in other areas of life, the thing that really makes a difference is attitude. As an employee, I try to think, okay, not everyone is trying to steal from my store. On the other hand, does every customer deserve service with a smile when she herself is being a royal queen bee? I thought this a couple of times yesterday. The first person who made me think this walked up complaining that she hadn't gotten a receipt several hours earlier, and this was due to our machines. I mean the first thing out of her mouth wasn't a civil greeting but an accusation of blame so that I would be responsible for her not having a receipt. Of course, she was exchanging the items she'd purchased at that time of the supposed machine failure. There's just something about someone who is immediately on the war path that makes another person want to put up her defenses. Anyway, I helped her, and she was very friendly to my coworker who was standing nearby, but then before she left she was complaining again in her sarcastic tone about the way I'd handled something else with her return. When she walked off, I discovered that the counter I slammed my hand on was not even intact. I will never forget her face. I think I would have thought she had a pretty face if she hadn't been griping and frowning. I will so remember her the next time she doesn't have a receipt and according to her it's my fault. That's if she didn't anger someone in the parking lot who retaliated and ran over her.

Another person last night complained that somebody in the store had told her the wrong time for a certain service we offer closing in the store. At first the woman acted like she didn't believe me that the said service had ended. So, she walked off, and I mumbled to myself that I wasn't going to argue with her. Then, she returned to my station and demanded to talk to management, because someone on the telephone had supposedly told her the wrong information. A manager came over, and apologized. Then, the manager told me to provide the service to her. So, I did. During that transaction, the woman tried to apologize. I wasn't going to forgive her for being rude and possibly getting me in trouble for something I didn't do (ie. I didn't even talk to her on the phone much less give her the wrong information). I hate when someone is rude and demanding, and then suddenly somehow seems to care about my opinion of her. So, I didn't say anything. I just did my job and acted like I didn't hear her lame apologies. Later, after I'd closed down my own area, I saw the person most likely to have talked to the woman on the phone. She knew the correct time that sevice would have ended, and said she wouldn't have relayed anything else.

Thirty Items or Less

Sometimes in the business of returning things, especially without a receipt, it seems like there should be a limit of items. One particular day, I had one customer try to return 21 items that were "gifts". Maybe laundry detergent would be a good house warming gift if I believed his story that he just moved to town. One problem with that: he had a local driver's license, and those usually take months to get to people. Of the 20 items, one was not from our store. Later that day, a guy tried to return 27 DVDS and 2 video games. He had a receipt, but no idea which movies were on there. Anyway, I found four of the movies on there, and because he couldn't produce a driver's license, I told him I'd walk him to the door with all of the 25 things he couldn't return. He asked me, "What does that mean? Walk me to the door?"

A couple of days later, there was a woman returning several things with a receipt, and a couple things without any receipts. Before she walked up, there was someone returning a giant musical/video game with a recent receipt and a system that was obviously older. So, somebody from that department had made her way to the Customer Service Counter and was carefully comparing the new game with the one those wandering customers were returning. So, the woman who had come behind them suddenly became very agitated and impatient. She told us I shouldn't have started to help her if I couldn't focus soley on her. From that point on, I continued with her return, but I felt no need to offer any friendliness or patience with her. I curtly told her, I'll need your driver's license for the items you are returning without a receipt. The first thing she had to sign, she thanked me for the money she got back, but I said nothing. The second time she thanked me I repsponded, "You're welcome" without thanking her like I usually do. When someone is impatient and unfriendly it really warms my heart. I feel so forturnate to have met this person, and I feel that it is no coincidence that I was the one who got to help this customer. I want to get all corny and tell the person that I don't make friends easily, but I hope this person will come back and see me soon to return another thirty items or so.

A Rare Occurence

The last night I worked, a woman was complaining to me, and saying that the policies I was following (copyright laws) were stupid. She was yelling at me, and stormed off in a huff. I said to some bystanders, "Well, I did make the copyright laws myself!" About fifteen minutes later, the phone rang, and I was still the only one there. I answered and the woman asked if she'd talked to me earlier about a cd. I asked if she meant in person. She said that's what she meant. Well, then she apologized to me for being rude. I really appreciated this and told her nobody had ever done this at work. She explained she'd thought about it and realized I was just following policy. I responded, "Well, I could have called a manager over to talk to you." She didn't even think I'd handled that wrong. So, anyway, I thanked her for the rare apology.

Customer Quotes

"Are you a supervisor? Get me your supervisor!' ( yelled by Customer A, who didn't get what he wanted)
"That's not my job!" (response fromCustomer B, who didn't want to follow the store's exchange/return policies)
"Can you hurry this up?" (Customer C says while she's texting)
"Thank you SO much." (Customer C says in a very condescending fashion)
"Very impolite!" (mutters Customer C when nobody says "You're Welcome" or anything else in response to her "thank-you")